Tuesday, October 27, 2009

At the Crossroads

Sandy had such a tough night last night, followed by a worse day today. She has coughed and gasped and hurt so much since 3:00 this morning. She called me at work today crying and told me that she couldn't do it anymore. I talked with Ryan and he said she wasn't able to drink any of her juices or take any of her meds or supplements. So I came home and spent a couple of hours with her talking and consoling and encouraging and crying.

She has fought such a courageous battle and she has tried so hard to beat this...but she is spent. She told me that she is ready for whatever happens and that she doesn't want to continue with the juices and supplements. She just wants to be out of pain...she wants to let nature run its course. She is at peace with her decision. As hard as that is for me to face, it is not my decision to make or to judge. I can only do everything within my power to respect it. I love her so much and I can't bear to see her hurt anymore. I told her how proud I am of her and that she should never feel as though she has failed. She is my hero!!

I have called all of the kids and told them about her decision. Like me, they love her far too much to see her suffer and they all understand and respect her decision.

I don't know what the coming days hold for Sandy, but we're going to do all that we can to keep her pain-free and comfortable. I have asked over and over for everyone's prayers and I appreciate everyone who has been praying. But I must ask once more that you will pray for Sandy's comfort and her peace of mind.

Thank you!!

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